Monday, May 17, 2010

Purity

Lately I have been struggling. For weeks I have fought a heartache and terrible feelings of inadequacy and insecurity. I have been fighting it, and some days have been better than others. I have had illuminating moments, followed by ever darker moments. I keep pressing toward the lighter ones. But life seems to be a constant battle for the light.

Today has been hard. I've been praying for help. Not much has eased the painful feelings. But then, my daughters came in from playing outside. One of them, trying to look nonchalant, came in like this:

She announced that she is now a farmer. Her little imagination and sweetness made me laugh. It made me smile. It lifted my heart. :)

At night lately, I sometimes struggle. My mind fills with negative thoughts and doubts about my abilities and my place in the world. But inevitably at times like that, this little one wakes up, and I snuggle her warm and tight next to me. And instantly, her pure spirit soothes my soul, and my mind rests and trusts again.



How do your children ease your heartache? What blessings they are. In all of the work, toil, and tears they can bring, they are the light of our lives.

5 comments:

Nicole said...

i loved your last line.... it is such a great reminder. hang in there ann, so many people look up to you , like me.

Jessie Mae said...

I love you! You are wonderful and beautiful! I miss you so much! And you are such a support to me... I would be lost without you! Hope you know you can talk to me anytime too... I am not trying to burden you down anymore :)

c h a n t i l e said...

It's amazing the little things that they do that lift you up! And I absolutely LOVE the pictures lol :)

Ruth said...

Do you think that Heavenly Father ever feels that way about us--that we lift and help Him?

Ann said...

I never thought of that before, mom. That makes me feel better and makes me want to do more. :)